Let It Go, Girl
Posted by fxckfeelings on January 28, 2010
For some people, every conversation is an argument to be won or lost. Some of those people are smart enough to go to law school and make money off their bad habits, but the rest have to learn to contain their competitive conversational spirit and look at the bigger picture. When it comes to wars of words, losing the battle helps you do more than win, it calls a truce.
–Dr. Lastname
My husband gets on me a lot about being irritable and negative sometimes (like when I’m tired, which is often, because I work a very stressful job in sales). I’m not saying he’s 100% wrong, but he also knows that, as someone who spends all day behind a desk putting deals together, my instinct is to get agreement at the end of every conversation and find an argument to smooth away every objection or accusation. I’m a closer, so my job is to never let go until I wear ‘em down and get the sale, but he treats every argument I put forward as if I’m being obnoxious and not listening. My goal is to persuade him that I’m not all that irritable and understand that, when I am, I’ve got good reason.
The hard sell may work at work, but if it works at home, it’s because you married a wimp, so be glad you didn’t.
It’s sad that letting out your irritability at home gets you in trouble, especially since you might think that home is the one place you can let fly. What’s true for flatulence, alas, isn’t true for speech.
