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Thursday, November 14, 2024

5 Ways To Manage Paranoid Thoughts

Posted by fxckfeelings on September 5, 2019

Paranoid thoughts don’t just feel inescapable, they feel infinite; convince yourself that one person is talking about you and you can find yourself doubting every friend and decision you’ve ever made. There’s no way to stop your brain from thinking or feeling whatever it pleases, paranoid or not, but here are five ways to manage those paranoid thoughts before they paralyze you completely.

1) Don’t Go Nuts Trying To Make Them Go Away

Trying to completely stamp out paranoid thoughts and feelings is like trying to eliminate intestinal gas; it’s a futile, painful exercise that make you obsessed with an asshole. Yes, medication or relaxation exercises may help to some degree, so they’re usually worth trying. In the end, however, there are usually some paranoid thoughts you can’t get rid of and need to accept and deal with. Dealing with them, however, doesn’t mean letting them run rampant and torment you; it means developing a bullshit detector that will keep the craziest thoughts under control.

2) Don’t Confuse Thoughts with Truth

Instead of trying to eliminate paranoid thoughts, work hard to evaluate them; ask yourself exactly what you think people are saying and who’s likely to actually react so strongly. With the slightest bit of scrutiny, these thoughts become easily dismissible; it should quickly become clear that you can’t think of anything you’ve actually done wrong, or imagine the people you care about judging you so harshly or the ones you don’t care about being too concerned about you either way. If, on the other hand, you think it’s possible some of your actions have been questionable, then it’s worth taking a harder look.

3) Examine Your Actions and Acquaintances

If you suspect you’ve done something really bad, think carefully about whether this action truly goes against your own values; ask yourself whether you’ve actually done anything so wrong that would give people a right to judge you badly or earn their disapproval. If you decide you haven’t really done anything that shady but that your friends may be overreacting, think about the whether the relationships with the people who make you paranoid are actually worth it or whether you’ve done anything to make them more important than they need to be. Relationships with people who judge and scrutinize you unfairly aren’t just unimportant, they aren’t worth having, period.

4) Reject Empty Reassurance

It’s tempting to ask people to assure you that it’s all in your head, and that they’re not angry and have no critical thoughts about you. Unfortunately, making such requests is like scratching at a scab; the relief is temporary, but every time you go back for more you’re actually making the problem worse. Plus you’ll just end up getting more paranoid wondering what those people think about your requests for reassurance, which pushes you to ask again, and so on, until you really have done something they’ll have a genuine reason to be annoyed about.

5) Forget The Thoughts And Find A New Focus

Once you’ve examined the content of your thoughts, the context of the relationships that seem to stimulate them and the credibility of both, it’s time to accept your conclusion and force yourself to move on. You can’t control people’s thoughts—your own or anyone else’s—so it’s time to focus on the stuff you do control, like your words and actions, and keep busy doing things you need to do. You can’t stop being paranoid, but you can find ways to keep those thoughts from overwhelming other priorities, preventing you from making smart decisions, and generally making you (and everyone around you) miserable.

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